It's a scary thing to surrender....even the act of "accepting Jesus as savior of one's life" is insanely humbling. "What? I can't do this on my own?" It's amazing how much pride can jack us up.
Laying down one's pride, choosing to forgive when it's painful, trusting that God has a plan - these kind of things leave us radically humble and vunerable. Laying down our defenses seems so counter-intuitive.
But you know what's crazy? I've found that I'm not just prey for the wolves when this happens. Instead of being mincemeat, I'm finding that there's crazy indwelling peace there. Laying down my need to please others has brought great contentment to my soul. Laying down my agenda and even my desire to get married....believe it or not....has given me calmness of spirit and probably actually made me more attractive to members of the opposite sex (and part of that is because I'm more at peace with myself!).
Surrending to God is radically counterintuitive. Surrending my desires for revenge, fame, fortune, sex, popularity...isn't this going to leave me with nothing? No, no, no it isn't. Just like the song says "it's an inside outside upside down kingdom, where you lose to gain and you die to live." -Misty
I may have lost all of those things, but I've gained so much more.
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